We were in the kitchen eating appetizers and cooling off your parents wine in the snow outside your sliding door. Hours before we were kissing in your parents car steaming up the windows while your mom was in the store. I had waited at the hospital while you finished cleaning. I took the early bus even though you told me to wait until the evening. I told the front desk i was there to see my dying grandfather but i would wait for my mother and father before checking in. Hours later you came in and we embraced in the enterence with the sliding doors. You were happy to see me but annoyed i didnt wait till the evening because your family was cleaning for me. I couldn't wait i said and kissed you on the forehead like i always did when you were annoyed. Besides i said i got to see where you grew up. I walked to your house but didnt knock. I saw the pond and the downtown strip and the hospital you went to when you or your sisters got sick. Everything i write is a ramble about the past. Of my hearts ancient bondage to that which does not last.